The Third rule in the Boy Scout Laws
[su_pullquote align=”right”]Merriam-webster.com defines helpful simply as “making it easier to do a job, deal with a problem, etc.”[/su_pullquote]
- What is it to be helpful?
- How would you define it?
- Where have you been helpful today?
The simple things are easy to do, but they are also easy not to do, being helpful is one of those. Being helpful is what we used to refer to as common sense manors. You see a child lost and crying, you help them find their parents, not wonder by, thinking ‘man that kid has neglectful parents’. You pull out a chair for a lady (old, young, pretty, etc). Hold open a door for ANYone, load groceries in to a car of an elderly person. Use simple and polite manners to express the thoughtfulness of others, set a table for guests, clean up a table after guests…. you get the point. And if you don’t, re-read that quote to the right and go to YouTube and search for a video on it.
Helpful. He must be prepared at any time to save life, help injured persons, and share the home duties. He must do at least one Good Turn to somebody every day.
Helpful. A Scout is concerned about other people. He does things willingly for others without pay or reward.
Helpful. A Scout is concerned about other people. He willingly volunteers to help others without expecting payment or reward. [second sentence completely reworded]
Helpful. A Scout cares about other people. He willingly volunteers to help others without expecting payment or reward. [changed “is concerned” to “cares”]
Helpful. A Scout cares about other people. He helps others without expecting payment or reward. He fulfills his duties to his family by helping at home. [simplifies the second sentence, and adds a new third sentence]
Again I was in the 1972-1990 range when I was in Boy Scouts…. I would strongly state and most people that know me would agree, that I often overload myself when helping others and spend a lot of time concerned with others situations.
Now a lot of that has changed, you know like a pendulum, you go so far one direction, you come back the other with just as much gusto. This doesn’t mean I got to the point where I didn’t care, however I developed a resentment of always helping others and rarely if ever was recognized for it or was it returned to me.
Don’t get me wrong, I never expected it, but there is a line that everyone has, a point where you build a thicker skin, because you don’t know how to say “No” when someone asks for help. You become overloaded, the promises you make become convoluted and you forget the important or timely ones. It’s not that you flake, however you start to say “No” to anything and everything.
Your mind changes from cheery to dreary… it’s not an overnight thing…. it takes years and often you don’t realize when or how it happened.
This was my story, my situation, it became my undoing of many things in my life including pleasure, opportunities and becoming a hermit for all intensive outward observations.
In my heart I knew what I could do, what I wanted to do, but distractions crept in, shiny object syndrome became a part of my life, because I wanted to help myself for a change. What I failed to see was that it required a mentor, someone that I needed to seek out for what it was that I wanted to learn or do and then pay it forward.
To this day, I help many people, for many things, sometimes cheerfully, other times with exhaustion or lack of enthusiasm. The mentor I was seeking came from inspirational and motivational books about overcoming situations in life, rising above and once again lending a hand in a helpful manner in a controlled way, so that I wasn’t pushing myself to the limit or over it.
If anything rings true for you in this, share with me, share with the people reading this post. Within Vulnerability there is strength, much the same as in failure there is an opportunity to learn.
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